Well, for the 37th time this year, people were tripping all over themselves about the Big Announcement that oil producers were going to make, and once again, it was about as meaningful as Oprah's pledge that she would permanently lose a lot of weight.

Yesterday, I was bracing myself for a very rough day today, so I did something very unusual – – I updated all my stops wider than Hillary Clinton's posterior to minimize any unwanted position closures. Mercifully, however, my might turn out all right, as God intended.